Feeling the Love
I just wanted to say that I’ve never felt this loved or supported in my whole life, and I can’t thank you all enough!
I agonised for days about sharing that I was coming home. I wrote 6 different blog posts to try to explain it before the one I shared. It’s wonderful to know that I have a community of wonderful people that are there not only during the good times, but during the toughest decisions of my life. You have all made me feel like I can fly into Melbourne with my head held high knowing that I’m coming home for all the right reasons, and not coming in sheepishly hoping that no one notices.
Sometimes it takes a leap of faith and a huge shake up to realise where you’re meant to be and what you’re meant to be doing. I’m quite sure that it was in part going to Alt and travelling to all 10 stops on this adventure that has helped me get to where I am now.
Thank you all so much for your support, I won’t ever forget it. I’m really looking forward to coming home and getting started on my next crazy big goal.
xx
Your Story is Important
I don’t really talk about my mental health much. Nobody really does. It’s not ‘cool’ and I always feel like people are staring me down, looking for the faker, the liar – because that’s how it felt when I was a kid. You weren’t bullied, you were just weak. That’s how they wrote your story.
But if you’ve read this blog for any length of time, you know that the sadness comes to visit. The doubt creeps in too. I think it happens to most people, we just see it all a little differently through our eyes and our own circumstances. But this post isn’t about the sadness, it’s about the light at the end of the tunnel.
A while ago, I really can’t remember when, I found out about this charity called To Write Love on Her Arms. It spoke to me in a way that other charities that focussed on mental health awareness didn’t. It spoke to me, it didn’t talk at me. It’s primary purpose from my perspective is to let young people and creatives know that they are not alone and that there is someone out there who ‘gets it’.
Their message and the work that they do made me wish they were around when I was younger. It was tough to be a kid who was without the parent that society deemed to be the ‘proper’ caregiver. It was tough to be the kid that knew exactly who she was and didn’t want to hide from that. I lost a bit of her, the fearless one, over the years, but she’s in there somewhere.
I love TWLOHA because their messages are simple: Your Story is Important; Love is the Movement. They are messages that breed hope. They remind us what is important. Love beats hate every time.
It was hard for me to choose the t-shirt I wanted from their store, but it’s the one in the selfie above that resonated with me, the creative, the most. I wear it when I’m having a hard day to remind me to do these things. Sometimes I wear it when I’m feeling awesome so that it speaks to someone else that needs to hear it.
If the last 4 years of being a part of the twitter creative/blogging community has taught me anything, it’s that we can deal with things better when we have someone who gets it. Someone who believes. With birthday number 27 looming, I believe more than ever that we need to stand together and talk these things out. Everybody’s story is important. We are all working hard to carve a good future for ourselves.
I think you’re doing a great job, even if you can’t quite see it today. If you can’t see past the doubt, ask someone to have a look for you, they just might be able to.
Here’s to big dreams, and loving all our victories – even the tiny ones.
x
Soul Searching & A New Adventure
It’s no secret that I’ve been doing some soul searching this year. The kind that makes you feel like you’re losing it and the kind that makes you question every-single-thing. But the beauty of really soul searching is that you eventually ask yourself the hard questions you’ve been avoiding and you get your most truthful answers.
So that’s what I did. I asked myself two very difficult questions:
What makes you happy?
What makes you feel alive?
They’re not easy questions to answer for me because they get to the core of my being, and sometimes a lot of the time I am thinking about how I can make other people feel happy and safe. But I was brave, and I really thought about it and I came up with this answer:
Travel & Living Overseas
There really isn’t anything in my world that makes ME happier than Travelling and living somewhere I am totally out of my comfort zone other than helping people. I love my family very much, but my comfort zone squishes me into someone who wants to make all of her family happy at once, and if you’ve ever met them you’ll realise that’s not really possible. (The perils of having a very large family)
Travelling makes me feel adventurous. It puts a smile on my face that you can’t wipe off. It just makes me feel ALIVE. I don’t think I’m describing it well, but that’s how I feel. I’ve been agonising over this for a while, but I know now what I need to do. I need to make this happen.
I want to feel alive again. I want to be out of my comfort zone and I want to challenge my view of the world. (It’s getting a little cynical of late)
So this is the basic plan:
Save up as much money as I can for the rest of this year, (whilst still blogging) and pack my bags in January for 2-3 months travelling across the USA eventually making it up to Canada where I will live and work for 1-2 years.
Clearly it’s a very ambitious plan and one that requires a lot of money in the bank. That’s why I’ve taken on a full time job as well as my design business.
But I’m also thinking of ways that you can be involved in this trip too (if you’d like to). Because I’d love to pack you all in my suitcase and bring you along for the ride (virtually, of course). I’ll let you know about them in another post very soon!
A little while ago, someone reminded me that my family and friends will be there for me no matter where I am in the world and it’s true.
I think it’s going to be one hell of an adventure and I can’t wait to see how it pans out.
Anyone want to come along for the ride?
