I realise that I’m already in that frame of mind that will get old to other people really quickly. I’m focused on this trip and I’m a bit boring. it’s my goal and because of it, I don’t have all that much to say that isn’t related to it.
It’s probably a good thing in some ways as it’s got me out of my own head, and I’m not dwelling on the negative. But I’m trying to tone down my excitement/anxiety/constant thoughts of this trip. I’m just not very good at it. It’s been a long time since I’ve been this enthusiastic about anything that wasn’t business related.
It seems all of my decisions are now geared towards this trip and this life change. I bought these gorgeous shoes (pictured) with the intention of taking them with me. They are comfy TOMS that I think will fit nicely into my bag but will also be awesome for flights. It’s a bit ridiculous as it’s still six months away, and so many people make these decisions and just up and move within a couple of months. Everything is a process for me.
I need to think it over. To stew on it. To think of the worst case scenarios. And what my plan is if the worst comes true. That’s how I work. It prepares me for something that in a split second I go from thinking this is the best idea ever, to me being totally crazy for thinking I can do something so frivolous and let’s admit it, selfish. This isn’t for anyone else. This is for me.
That’s something that I need to slowly convince myself is a good thing. Will everyone be ok without me? Will they hate that I missed their birthdays and special events? Will skype be enough to keep me in touch with them?
I’m guessing that this blog is going to be pretty focused on this over the next few months. I hope it doesn’t get boring and repetitive, but it probably will. If you’ve met me, I kind of am.
I will be making the applications for things soon, and in exciting news I am nearly 25% of the way there! YAY!! I’m thinking of putting up a thermometer in the sidebar so I have a visual of how I’m going. haha. (That could be a little over the top)
I hope you have an awesome week!