the other week I wrote a blog post. it was one that let everything that i’ve been keeping inside out. it was hard to write and some of the time i found it hard to breathe. i couldn’t bring myself to hit publish.
but it did help. a little bit. i’ve been struggling for a while now. if i could pinpoint a time where it started, i would say that it was around October last year. it seems like such a long time ago now that it’s may. but it also feels like no time at all.
somewhere along the way, i lost my confidence. my spark. it’s like i woke up and realised that i wasn’t in my early twenties anymore and people were judging me for how my life looks. that’s not all that much that is conventional and i think people see it as wrong. but it’s not just about them. the doubt in me is saying it too.
that’s why i stopped writing this blog. i felt i had nothing more to offer anyone. no value in my words. but i think i was wrong. this blog is what i need to get through the tough days and the way that i can let others know that they’re not the only ones feeling the same way.
the lost feeling hasn’t gone, but it doesn’t always hurt so much. i want to find my way back to the person i was when i started writing this blog. i don’t know how long it will take, or what it will say. but it’s coming and i’m ready.
one day i’ll be brave and share that blog post i wrote with you.
maybe you’ll come along on this ride with me?
photo by me.
I know what you mean, Danielle. Take courage, and remember that there are so many people who value you – not just for what you do, but for who you are. Not just for who you were – for who you are right now. I am one of them. Thanks for being a friend to me. x
Thanks so much Sally. Thanks for being my friend too. x
Oh, D. I’m here for the ride! I still really struggle with the turn away from the norm that our lives have taken and feel like I’m being judged for it and that we have to justify our choices but I think deep down it’s *my* fear that I’m having trouble overcoming. I’m not sure that anyone else cares, I think my battle is to accept I’m happiest not travelling the same path as everyone else. And for what it’s worth, I like having others on my not so travelled path, you included. xx
Thanks K! I totally get what you’re saying and can really relate. xx
<3
Thanks Mikaela. <3
Keep your chin up Dannielle! There are definitely highs and lows in life. You’ll find your way ;-)
Thanks Sarah! Glad to have you in my corner! :)
Oh, wow. I’ve been so buried under stuff that I’ve missed out on big things in your life. I’m sorry I’ve been so far away from the internet and being social! I stopped writing for generally the same reasons, though I stopped reading all of my favorite places because I just couldn’t keep track of everything anymore. :(
I can’t wait to talk to you, though. Hang in there! <3
I understand. It happens when you’re busy. It’s good that you’re busy though.